PoopTeen was the first to report that Josef Stalin and his band of Evil Doers were using baby sea turtles to deliver nuclear weapons. Since both Stalin and the ghost of Kim Jong Il have refused to take the 400m Freestyle challenge. We will now launch our secret plan to save the world from Josef Stalin and Kim Jong Un.
This is North Korean Ramen. The Eternal Leader says it make you strong and able to fight imperialism.
“The sultry days are going on, but the park is bustling with people, said Ri Man Gil, head of the Management Office of the Rungna People’s Sports Park.”
PoopTeen and the Gang of Aces are on the scene. We know that the Evil Doers aren’t just riding roller coasters having fun.
To all the doers of evil. Be forewarned that PoopTeen and the Gang of Aces have not forgotten about you. We have simply been busy rearranging the PoopCave. We painted the walls and bought new drapes. It feels much more open and airy.
I digress!!
We are on to you Kim Jong Un.
Stalin can’t pull a fast one by thinking you can slip in to office and then go off to Disney Japan with some 2 dollar whore from the back woods. You are not Kim Jong Nam!
We have no floral basket for you Kim Jong Un.
We only have a warning!!!
We know when you are sleeping. We know when you are not. But, most of all we know when you are pooping!! And that is when you are most vulnerable. Our trained dolphins will swim to your North Korean resort and blow you right out of your banana hammock!!
Your armor has chinks. We know it. You are doomed.
Mini Monkey-Teen and other Aces have informed PoopTeen HQ that Vladimir Putin has been doing some dodgy things with dogs.
Mr. Putin always looking for a reason to take off his shirt has been frolicking with Laika’s progeny when he isn’t out wrestling tigers. Mini Monkey-Teen has discovered that Russia is building a new Cosmodrome not to put men in to space but instead to drop bombs made of puppies on all the freedom loving people of Earth.
Not to worry. PoopTeen and The Gang of Aces will protect you. Once again the children are safe and will sleep easy.
PoopTeen and the Gang of Aces have been deep inside North Korea for the last two years. It is only now that we can reveal what we and our spy network has uncovered.
The North Koreans have been working hard on two very important issues.
1) Design the most bright green uniforms that provide zero camouflage anywhere in the natural world.
2) Use basic small arms to repel regular attacks from Godzilla where he is known locally as Pulgasari.
PoopTeen is able to show you this now declassified photo as proof.
PoopTeen and the Gang of Aces would like to present the Evil Doer Kim Jong Un with this cheap carp. It is our way of saying thank you for the laughs.
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